I just realised my last blog post was on October 4th..
In the meantime my dad’s cancer has returned and is now considered terminal. The doctors guessed at a time from ranging from 2 years to very soon. This is perhaps the main reason why blogging hasn’t really been at the forefront of my mind lately.
In stead we convinced my parents to move to the new house ASAP, so last weekend we pooled the family resources and got the job done. Back-breaking work, but the end result was gorgeous, and that’s what matters. It will be a good home for them while my dad lasts, and after that it will also work well for my mother on her own.
It was a tough weekend, and not much to do with gardening with one exception: I got home with another suitcase full of perennials from the old garden. A large clump of hostas, a good few winter asters, some evening primroses – both plants and seeds – and a single unidentified rose. (And a half-knit jumper for one of my nephews that my mother can’t face finishing, so I promised her I’d get it done for her before Christmas.)
So there. A hectic and taxing month. And November looks quite busy as well, with two trips to Scotland, a myriad of social engagements and of course the hope of getting around to readying the garden for winter.
So sorry about the news on your Dad. I really admire the way you have all worked together to make sure that he gets to enjoy the new house, I hope it will help make it a haven for your Mum afterwards too, such a difficult time. I hope the new perennials rescued from your parent’s old garden help you manage what must be such a challenging time.
Well, my family has many issues, but we do “pulling through” well. And the new place is lovely; a beautiful house with views over the bay and the medieval castle ruin on a small island just off the shore… It’s a good place to grow old, and it’s a mile away from my younger brother and his girlfriend and two kids, so my parents have a support network just around the corner if they need it.
So sorry to hear about your Dad. My father has cancer, too. Unfortunately, it has pulled our family apart. In contrast, it seems like your family is closer now. That part is nice. I hope your parents enjoy the new home.
I wouldn’t say we’re actually closer. We are as we always were – as families are most, with issues and troubles and love and affection and so on in one great mess. But we get things done, both in practical and emotional terms; we helped my parents move, we call them more often now because they need it more and we generally just muddle through.
And they do enjoy the new home, as well they should. It’s a beautiful house and it has turned into a beautiful home now they have moved in.Thank you for your concern, and I’m sorry to hear that your family has to deal with divisions on top of the cancer. As if the big C wasn’t enough, really.
I’m also sorry to hear your sad news. November does sound like it will be busy, and maybe that’s not a bad thing at the moment.
xx Lyn
I would like to have some time to just relax, “center myself” and just be, rather than having all these things I need to get done. Still, I take the time as and when I can, and that will be enough for now.
Thank you.
So sorry about your Dad, Søren.
I hate cancer. F*ck cancer (I wouldn’t have used the asterisk on my page, but i’m being polite on yours).
I understand the pull of ‘real life’ away from blogging, but I hope you’ll always stick around even if it’s infrequent.
I think you’re an awesome guy, and a great blogger.
You can write “fuck” in the comments of my blog. Hell, you can even write “FUCK-FUCKITTY-FUCK”! Here in Denmark we tend to swear a lot more than in English-speaking coutries, with a lot of our Danish swear words having been replaced by English swear words, so “fuck” is a regular part of the Danish vocabulary. And quite appropriate to the situation.
And I’ll be around, and once I have more time to “spoil myself” (i.e. take time to blog, read blogs and so on) I’m sure the posts will become more frequent again.
And you’re much too kind, I’m sure. (Yes, I’ve lived in England for a while in the past and picked up quite a few old-school British phrases along the way.) For what it’s worth, I think you’re fucking great as well.
(Oh, and here’s a gratuitous fuck, just so you know you don’t have to mince your words over here. FUCK!)
Sorry to hear about your father, had hoped for better news. But a new house is something. I remember the pictures you showed us.
Perhaps we’ll get a glimpse of the garden there?
I can remember living thru this 20 years ago. Sending a virtual hug. Diana
The garden is still just a lawn with a few straggly small shrubs plopped down here and there around the edges, so there’s not much to show. Still, it has potential, and they have some larger shrubs that are waiting to be moved there when the old house is sold.
And sadly far too many people I’ve mentioned this to have had personal experience with cancer.
So sorry for the news of your dad’s cancer. You have certainly taken charge and made some sound decisions. Your mom is lucky to have you. My thoughts are with you.
Sandra
My brothers and I are lucky to have our parents, for better for worse. I guess now it’s payback-time for all those times they took us to the beach or on camping trips in Norway and Sweden, right? And it feels good to know that by helping with some practical bits, my parents will have just a bit more energy to handle the stuff that’s really important, which is themselves.
My thoughts and prayers are with you xxx
They’re much appreciated. I don’t come from a religious family myself, but a prayer can never harm, especially when faced with something too large for us to handle ourselves. Things will go as they may, and we can only hope that they may go as well as possible. Whatever that means.